And now you're hopping onto the gondola
With a snowboard attached to your foot

Goofy foot, ok
Regular foot, ok
And with the fever for the powder
You'll be on that hill all day
Front edge digger, faceplant, it hurts
Your face scraping hard in the hot cold ice
Scorpion back pincher, ain't nothing nice

[CHORUS]
Faceplant scorpion backpinch
Left foot twisted, spine bent
[x2]

Snowboard with confidence
Looking at all the fine snowboard chicks

Knees bent,ok
Posture, ok

Caught in a faceplant Because you were off daydreaming
Now you're sitting on your ass in pain again

Unconcious, ok
One second delay

'Till the ambulance comes to take me away
No more faceplants for me to do today

[CHORUS]

Jumped to the dance floor
Swimming on a sea of hands
Tribal coral reef below me, taking a chance
Boots caught up on someone's shoulder
My head the melon, the floor the boulder

Had to keep on singing
That's what James Brown would say
Bowl the dead weight back up to the stage

Faceplant [x4]

BRRRR...
Snow down the front, nutt, back and crotch
Abominable snowman, yetti, thanks alot
Backfoot flip, snowboard spine tweak
No pain without the powder, stuck four feet deep
More than a mighty wind carried on my head
Vertebraes cracking like dry french bread
Turn the other way, I should have been bittin'
Ski patrol dude might now be freaking
Landed smack down on my forehead
For a minute I thought I was dead

[CHORUS]

All hands on deck, calculations incorrect
FACEPLANT!