Football Tonite
Sweep up the kitchen
Hurry and do the dishes
Bring me a beer mab'
I'll let you go out with your other bitches
Sweep up the kitchen
Could you turn off the goddamn lights?
Fetch me the remote control
We got football tonite
Football tonite
Football tonite

Did I tell you last week when you cooked for me
That fried chicken was a little bit too greasy?
Them carrots that you cooked weren't boiled enough
Now when you gonna do something right? get off your duff

Sweep up the kitchen
Hurry and do the dishes
Bring me a beer mab'
I'll let you go out with your other bitches
Sweep up the kitchen
Could you turn off the goddamn lights?
Fetch me the remote control
We got football tonite
Football tonite
Football tonite

Well, they told me last week at work that my shirts
They really weren't ironed that well
They told me last week at work that my shirts
They really weren't ironed that well, you said, oh, well

Sweep up the kitchen
Hurry and do the dishes
Bring me a beer mab'
I'll let you go out with your other bitches
Sweep up the kitchen
Could you turn off the goddamn lights?
Fetch me the remote control
We got football tonite
Football tonite
Football tonite

You been tellin' all your friends that I drink too much
Whiskey in the moring and it ain't no crutch
I never have time to take a big shit, man
You're always listening to that damn slim whitman
Runnin 'round the house with your shower cap on
Curlers in your hair, and your toenails long
Chunky bar breath and your enquiring mind
When I see you in the morning looking like a pork rind
You snivel to your momma and you say you can't cope
Well this ain't thirty-something and you ain't hope, now

Sweep up the kitchen
Hurry and do the dishes
Bring me a beer mab'
I'll let you go out with your other bitches
Sweep up the kitchen
Could you turn off the goddamn lights?
Fetch me the remote control
We got football tonite
Football tonite
Football tonite